The Truth.

Okay, I'm going to say something that I never thought would leave my mouth—or I guess in this case, leave my thoughts to my fingers—when I started this journey. It may surprise many of you who have been with me from the beginning, as I've shared joy after joy. Those joys don't lessen this statement and this statement doesn't lessen that joy.

There are days I hate having a service dog.

Now let me be abundantly clear: there has never been, nor will there ever be, a moment in my life that I hate having Zido. He's saved my life—physically, mentally, and emotionally—when I was close to losing all three. He's given me endless moments of laughter, pride, and a happiness I didn't even know existed. He's introduced me to countless numbers of people that I would never have had in my life if I didn't have him. He's given me a freedom that I had long lost hope of ever having. He, in short, is my miracle.

But this post is about my moments of just being human; my moments of, "what if..." and "why me...." My moments of wanting to blend back in and just have a "normal"—albeit sick, freedom-less, scared to be alone—life.

You're probably sitting here, reading this and thinking "Woah, Courtney, take the melodrama down about 23 notches. We want our 'service dogs are the best creatures to bless the ground we walk on' post. None of this 'to be or not to be....that is the question....' stuff."

Well, quite frankly, that sunny, rosey, Instagram-filtered post is exactly the kind I want to share with you, but this is the one that's real to me right now. Don't fear, the joy and the happiness is still here and those posts WILL be back, but for now let's just take a moment to really understand what having a service dog is like, warts and all.

It's being told that you can't book a cabin for your honeymoon because they wouldn't be able to accommodate my dog in case of an emergency (don't ask...long story.)

It's being seated in the back corner of a restaurant that's close to empty, and knowing exactly why.

It's waiting for a public ride-share car to pick you and you husband up in the snow, excited to celebrate your anniversary, only to have them drive off once they see you.

It's being moved 3 times at a show that you paid for front section seats to, only to end up in the back row because that's the only place your dog can fit.

It's sitting on the metro—like I am now—trying to get home, and you know without even looking up that many of the people are staring at and whispering about you, and at least 2 people are probably sneaking pictures that will end up who knows where.

It's looking to a parent for help when their child asks if she can pet your dog, and them getting upset when you tell their child no.

It's getting to a job interview that you were really excited about, only to spend 30 minutes talking about your dog's qualifications for his job.

It's sitting in a restaurant and having someone bring their child up to you and continue to point at you as they loudly talk about you.

It's having a person scream and say you can't get on an elevator because they're scared of dogs.

Basically, having a service dog isn't fun.

But.

Having a service dog is so much more than just "fun."

It's falling in love with your husband because he accepts you, despite all of the above.

It's getting the opportunity to speak in front of rooms of people and telling them how your life has changed, for the better.

It's graduating college and moving on to success when you never thought you could.

It's having your best friend right at your feet when you feel anxious or when you're afraid that you're going to get sick.

It's knowing that you're going to be okay, because you have someone monitoring your every heart beat.

It's educating people about their actions and seeing the light bulb click.

It's finding a passion that you never knew you had and learning how to be a partner.

Yes, there are days—more than I would like—when I think about what my life could be like without a service dog.

But then I truly think about what my WAS like without a service dog, and I remember that it was really no life at all.

Love and blessings,
Zee and Me

Why Your Fake Service Dog is Ruining My Life

   I know this post might make some of you angry, and I'm truly sorry for that, but it is something that is incredibly near and dear to my heart. This is my blog and my way of expressing personal opinions in order to show what living life with a service dog is really like. Because it's more than just "getting to have my dog with me all day." It's a constant struggle to fit in and it's a constant fight for my rights as a person with a disability. I pray that you understand that and please know that I am not writing this in anger. I'm not writing it to hurt feelings. I'm not writing this to spark controversy. I'm writing it because it is MY truth. This post will also be heavy with outside links so if you have any further questions on what I've said, I highly encourage you follow those links and even do some research of your own.

   Okay I'm going to start this off with an incredibly important point:

I am NOT a lawyer.

   The only "legal-ese" that I base my knowledge of service dog laws on is what comes from Title II and Title III of the Americans with Disabilities Act (ADA) which is:

"Under the ADA, a service animal is defined as a dog that has been individually trained to do work or perform tasks for an individual with a disability.  The task(s) performed by the dog must be directly related to the person's disability."

   Now, you may be asking yourself "Okay well what does that mean 'work or perform tasks'?" The ADA "Frequently Asked Questions" page has that covered as well:

"The dog must be trained to take a specific action when needed to assist the person with a disability. For example, a person with diabetes may have a dog that is trained to alert him when his blood sugar reaches high or low levels. A person with depression may have a dog that is trained to remind her to take her medication. Or, a person who has epilepsy may have a dog that is trained to detect the onset of a seizure and then help the person remain safe during the seizure."

   These tasks can also include such things as going to get a juice box when the dog senses a lowering in blood sugar, opening doors for people who use wheelchairs, assisting in taking socks/shoes off for those of us that get lightheaded or dizzy when we bend over, or (like Zido and me) the dog is trained to tug while walking on harness so that the person's heart doesn't work as hard for them to walk. I also use Zido when I'm on the ground and I need to stand up. He is trained to plant his feet and I can place my hands in specific locations and put my full weight on him to help me stand up.

   According to the ADA, simply providing comfort to their human does NOT qualify as performing a trained task in order to be recognized as a service dog. That is what's called an "Emotional Support Animal" (ESA). Rights for people with ESAs generally fall under the Fair Housing Act because GENERALLY, ESA rights do not extend outside of a house (airplanes are different but there are separate laws regarding air travel.)

   There's another category of assistance animals known as "Therapy Animals." You have probably run into them at hospitals, nursing homes, libraries, special education classrooms, and a few other places. People with therapy dogs have VERY different rights as compared to service dogs under the ADA. According to the National Network website (look specifically at section III):

"Even though some states have laws defining therapy animals, these animals are not limited to working with people with disabilities and therefore are not covered by federal laws protecting the use of service animals.  Therapy animals provide people with therapeutic contact, usually in a clinical setting, to improve their physical, social, emotional, and/or cognitive functioning."

   This means that the rights for a person with a therapy animal extend only so far as to the place they are ASSIGNED to work. So if I have a dog that I have certified as a therapy dog and have an agreement with Children's Hospital to come on Wednesdays and Saturdays to the pediatric cancer ward between the hours of 10 a.m. and 3 p.m., that's as far as my rights extend. If on my drive to Children's I have to stop at Giant to pick up some candy for the children, I CANNOT bring my therapy dog into Giant with me, because that is not his assigned location of work. My only public access right is specifically where and when I have an agreement to work with him. I know that's a little redundant, but that's an incredibly common mistake that I run across very often so I want to be sure that the difference is understood.

   Okay so now that I have all of that legal stuff out, I'm going to go to strictly my opinion. To put it as bluntly as I can, there is no excuse for someone to pass off their dog as a service dog when they are not. None. Zero excuses.

   When Zido was born on April 10, 2012, he basically went straight into training. Of course, he spent many many weeks with his mother and siblings and was in no way, shape, or form taken from any of them before the right time. But as soon as Canine Partners for Life (CPL) breeds a litter of puppies, they start taking notes. They see behaviors: they look for the brave ones, they look for the timid ones, they look for the ones that show problem-solving skills. They see everything. When the proper time came, Zido was then placed with a Puppy Raiser. I stay in contact with this family to this day, and I cannot stress how important their job was for that first year of Zido's life. Not only did they have to deal with the naughty puppy stage (they told me they still have baby-safe products on their cabinets because of Zido), but they also taught many many many of his most basic and most important skills during the year they had him. Right away, he was learning sit, stay, down, heel, back, front, side, leave-it, etc. Each month, they had to fill out a review form on Zido's progress and had to attend training sessions at CPL twice a month (I believe it's that often).

   Then, after that first year, the family gave him back to CPL so he could be trained for his future partner. AKA...me. I can't even imagine the pain they went through saying good bye to him, but every single puppy raiser I have ever spoken to has said that seeing the change their dogs make in the lives of their partners makes each tear, each pee-stain, each "Zido...NO!" worth it. Once Zido was back at CPL, he went through another year of intense training. Here, he learned how to pick things up, open doors, take off jackets, tug on harness, turn on/off light switches, open refrigerators, and the list goes on.

   THEN after a year of that training, CPL went through all of their applicants to place their dogs with the right person. I was placed with Zido on August 8, 2014. On October 10, 2014 my mom and I packed everything and basically moved to Pennsylvania for 3 weeks of INTENSE training (see my blog posts from back then to begin to understand the intensity of those 3 weeks). It was ONLY after we had successfully completed those weeks of training that we were certified as a service dog team and I could take him home. But don't think for a moment that the training stopped there. Aside from the daily obedience training, there were SIX TIMES during the first year together that we had to travel 4 hours up to CPL, complete a 2 hour Graduate Support Class, and drive 4 hours back home. Then, at our 1 year anniversary, we had to be re-certified and now we will have to go up to be re-certified every 2 years for the rest of our partnership.

   "Courtney, why are you telling us all of this? We get it...Zido is well trained. What does this have to do with fake service dogs?" It has EVERYTHING to do with fake service dogs, because you see, Zido had to go through 2 1/2 YEARS of training before we began our life together. I had to go through 10 YEARS of living with a disability that could put my life in danger at any moment of any day before I could have the security that Zido gives me. CPL has invested $30,000 into EACH DOG during their lives. Before I was even born, people with disabilities were fighting to have civil rights when the ADA was passed (July 26, 1990). And you know what? The moment someone chooses to go online, buy a "service dog vest" for $60, pay for a doctor's note from some online forum saying they "deserve" a service dog, put the vest on Fifi and walk into Target, they ruin it all.

   Legally, I have the right to walk into any establishment with Zido and no one can tell me to leave because I can't have my dog there. For me, it's frustrating beyond belief when I am told to and I have to fight for my rights to be there. When I just want to go on a fun date with Zack and I have to instead pull out my law book from Zido's pouch and prove that I have every right to have my dog with me, I'm only thinking of the ones who ruined it for me. Because I have to think that maybe that business has had a horrible experience with people claiming their pet is a service dog in the past and their tainted view is now being applied to me and my dog. According to the ADA, a business is able to ask that the dog be removed from the premises when the dog becomes out of control (i.e. barking, growling, relieving itself, interrupting other customers, walking around unsupervised). From that moment on, that business most likely thinks that ALL service dogs are disruptive and should not be allowed in. However, that's illegal, but businesses DO have some rights when it comes to service dogs. The sad part is that many businesses are too scared to ask someone to leave because they don't know their rights as a business.

   Legally, a business is allowed to ask TWO QUESTIONS of service dog partners (also on the "Frequently Asked Questions" ADA page):

"(1) is the dog a service animal required because of a disability? and (2) what work or task has the dog been trained to perform?"

   They (and any other strangers) are NOT allowed to ask WHAT disability the person has.

   If a person can't answer either of those questions, the business is allowed to ask the person to leave the dog outside. Note: the PERSON cannot be denied services, but the DOG can be denied access. Of course, people lie. That's the hard truth of humanity. So when they lie, and they keep their untrained, non-service dog in the public's eye, they become the example for the rest of us.

   Too many times, I hear horror stories of "service dogs" and while it often times leads to a compliment on Zido's temperament and behavior, it still infuriates me knowing what people are doing. I've heard of a lady that let her "service dog" walk around during a yoga class and go up to people. I've seen "service dogs" with full-blown muzzles around their mouths to keep them from biting people. These are just two of the stories I can recall, but trust me there are plenty.

   (Also, side note, there's a reason they are called service DOGS. The ADA covers dogs and miniature horses as service animals. No other animal is recognized as being an ADA-approved service animal. However, there are therapy ANIMALS because there are no restrictions on what can be a therapy animal. Fun Fact: during training, I had to read an article on a "service snake" that wrapped itself around the human's neck when it sensed an impending seizure. My analysis? The snake was sensing an impending weakness and was preparing to suffocate the human. But that's just my opinion...)

   Through all of this, what I'm trying to say is this: when a person chooses to take their pet out in public because they "just can't stand the thought of leaving her at home" or they "think this would be therapeutic for him" or whatever else they tell themselves, I want them to think of two things:

(1) It is a SCARY world out there. There are a lot of sounds, smells, people, quick-moving small children, and sights that little Spot has never encountered during his day-to-day life at home or on a walk around the neighborhood. And he loves it. When his owner takes him to Target because they want to, he is TERRIFIED of everything he is being exposed to. I'm sorry, but if they care SO much about their dog that they just can't stand the thought of leaving him at home where he is comfortable and happy, and instead choose to throw him in a situation he has never experienced, I'm thinking they're actually being pretty selfish and thoughtless. I don't care how "well trained" they think he is. He is a dog, and when a dog gets scared or threatened, he's going to do what he knows he needs to do to protect himself. They're just asking for trouble.

(2) They are ruining the day-to-day life of those of us who NEED our dogs. How would you like if you walked into a store, and you notice five separate employees eyeing you during your trip just WAITING for you to do something. One of them finally has the courage to come up and say "Excuse me, ma'am. We have a strict 'no blonde' policy so I'm going to have to ask you to leave." It sounds ridiculous right? Well you know what, Zido has become a part of me. I could just as successfully separate myself from him as I could cut my arm off and continue on my day. When a store only has poor experience with service dogs, as much as it hurts, it's no wonder they're going to ask. It doesn't make it legal and it doesn't make it right by any means, but it makes sense why they would ask. People passing off their dogs as service dogs are the reason for that.

    If you can't tell, this is something that I'm incredibly passionate about. I dream of working in the Civil Rights Division of the Department of Justice so that I can help make the lives of all people with disabilities better. If you have any other questions, or if you have KIND comments, I would love to hear them. I will remind you that I am no expert in the law. I will either Google an answer for you or contact someone who can help, but I would love to talk about this more if anyone has any questions.

   I know I normally say "Up next on Zee and Me" but to be perfectly honest, I have put so much thought and emotions into this post that I haven't even thought about what my next one will be. All I can say is stay tuned because another one is coming up.

Love and blessings,

Zee and Me